


Gifts, Horses and Stupidities

by jisoomes



Series: Pony-Verse [3]
Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, a little angsty at the start :(
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-20
Updated: 2020-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:07:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28191414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jisoomes/pseuds/jisoomes
Summary: “Thank you, dear.” She took it, frowning when she didn’t recognise the paper. “Who is this from?”Maybe Portia, she thought as she opened the tag. Although, how her best friend snuck a present under Haymitch’s tree without her noticing…Effie,Merry Christmas, sweetheart.
Relationships: Haymitch Abernathy/Effie Trinket
Series: Pony-Verse [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1990873
Comments: 6
Kudos: 13





	Gifts, Horses and Stupidities

Effie downed the last of her wine with a hint of irritation. Not that anybody noticed, they were all very interested in whatever story Finnick was telling. Or pretending to, at least.

Not for the first time that night, she felt like an outsider.

It wasn’t the children’s fault. They had smiled and interacted with the small talk she had offered in the beginning, as usual. This week, Peeta had even made a little joke. But overall… The interaction had been surface level and lukewarm.

There was nobody to bridge the line between her and the children. She had always been different to them but somehow it had worked. Well, the _somehow_ happened to look a lot like the brooding man to her left opposite her.

She glanced at her friend - or ex-friend, she supposed now. Haymitch was sat slumped in the corner with a drink that he had not long refilled yet was already almost empty. He looked awful. Dark circles under his eyes and skin that clung a little desperately to his face because he had lost weight...

Gone were the taunts and smirks. Replaced with a gloomy silence that almost physically hurt to be around.

It felt like a stab in the chest every time she looked at him. One she knew she deserved because this whole mess was her fault.

The children pretended as if nothing was amiss, even _Prim_. It was a behaviour that baffled her because Effie knew they loved Haymitch like she did, maybe even more for some of them. How could they be okay with him looking like this all the time? How could they pretend?

_She_ was certainly struggling to pretend nothing was amiss.

Their group… Their chosen family was anything but fake. It was the main reason she had grown to love their Sunday dinners every other week. When they were upset, they didn’t hide it. They argued and resolved and it always made them stronger.

A stark contrast to her biological family. Where everything was hidden in tones and disapproving looks. Where conflict was dissolved by days of silent treatment by whoever couldn’t stand it anymore waving the white flag...

Sometimes, she felt like there was no difference between the houses now. At her mother’s she had always tried her best to blend in. Long past were the days where she naively thought she could challenge the issues. Now, she was content to blindly listen to her father or sister prattle on. Her only amusement being the secret eye rolls exchanged between her and Marcus…

Here at Haymitch’s house, there was nobody to roll eyes with. Occasionally, there was a tense smile between her and one of the boys. Peeta’s always laced with a slight strain and Finnick’s with sadness.

That, she thought, was what stung most of all. Losing her best friend was hard enough - but not unexpected. She knew after those night things wouldn’t feel back to normal. She had hoped he would play pretend but this was nothing she hadn’t been expecting. 

The children, however… She had done _this_ for them. For them to still have their parental figures. The knowledge that she had accidentally ruined that for them was the most painful part of this whole predicament. It weighed heavy in her head and chest every time they spent time together. That sat heavily between her shoulder blades whenever they weren’t...

And she had no idea how to fix it.

-  


November passed slowly. Each day the pressure in her shoulders hurt a little more. The children’s faces became more and more strained. What were once group activities whittled into smaller segments. Her and Peeta manning the bakery. Finnick and Haymitch picking Prim up from school. Her taking care of the riding lessons...

“I’m sorry,” she told Prim as they lugged the boxes of Christmas decorations into the stable. 

Haymitch hadn’t shown up, not that she had really expected him to. A part of her wished for them to be stronger than this. To pull together instead of putting the children in the middle of them…

“It’s fine,” the girl said. Effie knew she meant it too and that only stung harder. Already so mature and understanding… “Did you find the pink decorations?”

She smiled, trying her best to make it reach her eyes. “I certainly did, I even managed to find a small enough tree for the door...”

As they unpacked the boxes, filling the little room full of lights and tinsel and the mini white tree for the door, Effie tried not to think about what Haymitch would have said. All the teasing comments he’d have for the white and pink theme...

All the sort-of family joy she was depriving Prim because she had been too scared to take the leap.

Sometimes, she thought it would have been better to have tried. She hadn’t quite realised how much his absence would affect her. Hadn’t realised it would hurt them both so much…

All she wanted was for him to be happy. Yet somehow, they had both ended up miserable.

-  


A week before Christmas, she was at the end of her rope.

“Have you decided where you’re spending the day yet?” Portia hummed from the other end of the phone.

She sorely missed when her best friend lived close enough to show up with wine within twenty minutes' notice.

“No… Not yet,” she sighed. It had never been a hard choice before. Sure, she had always forced herself to visit her parents on the 24th but there was no competition between the frosty family dinners at her parent’s house and the warm, inviting day with the children.

It felt like a real family should, she thought. Christmas with them was loud and rowdy and usually full of laughs.

This year though? She had the feeling her presence would only spoil that.

She closed her eyes and pressed her head harder against the back of the couch. “I might just spend it alone.”

“Nonsense,” her friend scoffed. “You are welcome to join Cinna and me.”

She considered it. That’s how bad this was getting. She considered crashing her best friend’s Christmas.

“Didn’t you tell me the dress code was naked? I think I’ll pass,” she laughed. It sounded empty to her own ears.

Portia picked up on it too. “You can’t avoid him forever, darling.”

“I am not the one doing the avoiding.” Not quite a lie, she thought. But not entirely truthful either. Haymitch had been the one skipping promises with the children. Either leaving it to her or letting them down.

She hated him for not making this all on her. She hated herself for being too cowardly to do something about it even more.  
Like stepping away from group activities. Or talking to him. Apologising and asking for a redo...

“One day, you two are going to figure it out. And I am going to throw a big party to celebrate,” her friend deadpanned. “You are being stupid, I don’t know how many more times I have to tell you that before you do something about it.”

“It’s too late. Even if I wanted to, he is… _upset_ with me, Portia…”

Her friend scoffed. “Of course he is, that doesn’t mean he won’t take you back if you tell him how silly you’ve been.”

Portia’s words lingered in the air for a moment. Lingered in her head.

Would he? Did she want him to?

Just the very thought sent her heart racing. Was it the commitment that she was concerned about? Or the possibility of hurting him? She had yet to figure out why she was such poison in relationships…

Or maybe that was just how she was meant to be, her mother had always said she had ruined her marriage too… _Always so inconsiderate and selfish_...

The whole purpose of rejecting him had been to save him the hurt. To protect him from the inevitable heartbreak because she always had to mess up. To kiss someone she shouldn't. To poke and poke until she sent men running the other way… A _monster_ , as her mother called it.

“I mean it in the best way possible,” Portia rushed to reassure her. “When was the last time _you_ were interested in somebody? And I don’t mean to shut your mother up or make you feel wanted.”

She licked her lips, trying to think. Trying _very hard_ to think, actually. It was true she tended to date whenever her mother mentioned it had been a while. Or whenever she was feeling down about herself. It wasn’t like she hadn’t liked the men she found to make her feel better. But had she wanted them? Not really. Would she have gone for them if she hadn’t had a motive? Probably not.

Her best friend let out a little laugh. “See? Look at you all speechless. Give him a call, darling. You know I am right.”

“No.” Effie shook her head, refusing to be swayed. “I’m on a sabbatical from men, remember?”

She could practically hear the eye-roll through the phone. “That is still the most ridiculous idea that has come from your silly brain. You’re miserable as it is, what do you have to lose?” 

“What if he’s changed his mind?” She insisted, certain it wasn’t as easy as her friend was telling her. After all, Haymitch had never been the most forgiving person. And if it had been her in his situation, she might have convinced herself by now that she deserved better.

He did deserve better. Better than somebody too afraid to face her feelings. Better than somebody who took the cowards way out of situations. Better than somebody who had ruined all of her relationships by being impulsive and selfish and…

“Please!” Portia interrupted her thoughts. “He has been half in love with you for how long? He will take you back. You’re meant to be. Just do it or so help me I will write him a letter and send it in your name.”

“You would not!”

“Make it happen, Effie,” her friend demanded. “I bet Christmas to New Year and you will not lose me the money. I have my eyes on a gorgeous pair of shoes and if I do not get them…”

“A bet?” Effie gasped. “Oh tell me you did not involve yourself with that silly scheme with the children. Portia! You should know better.”

“I know you’re being stupid,” her friend defended. “And I know you’re going to end up together sooner or later. I have to go, think about calling him. And the shoes!” 

Effie barely had time to open her mouth before the call cut off.

-  


As Christmas day loomed, Effie struggled to make the decision.

Morally, she knew she should visit her parents. Leave Haymitch with the children because otherwise he would be miserable and she always irritated the others a little with her love for Christmas. They would be satisfied with just a simple meal but she loved the gifts and the games and the movies. The full shebang.

The selfish part of her wanted to save herself the torment that was Christmas with the Trinkets and spend it with the children anyway… 

She was beginning to doubt if the cowards way out were really worth all this. Surely, the enviable break up with Haymitch would have ended exactly like this, anyway? Except now she still didn't know what he tasted like sober. Or what it would be like to wake up next to him. Or know what it felt like to be held tightly in his arms, skin on skin…

Those were the thoughts that plagued her mind every night. Coupled with the haunting sight of Haymitch when she had rejected him. The reminder of how miserable she had made him…

So _not_ worth it…

Portia might have been right. With things as they were now, what _did_ she have to lose? 

She finished the coffee in one big sip, wincing because it was lukewarm bordering on cold.

Peeta smiled when she brought the cup back. “Off already?”

“Unfortunately.” Her words hung in the air for a moment before she continued. “Listen, Peeta I’ve been thinking about Christmas day and… I just wondered if you would be uncomfortable with me there.”

The boy froze, his hand fell loose around the cup he had yet to pick up… “Don’t be silly, Effie. You’re always welcome.”

Relief washed over her but it was brief. “I just mean, with Haymitch…”

Peeta’s gaze softened. “Effie, whatever’s going on between you two is your business, not ours.”

She marvelled, for a moment, at how mature he had become. Such a difference from the lost and lonely boy she met all those years ago...

As if seeing him for the first time, her eyes studied his face. Noted the stronger jaw, the fuller cheeks surrounding the same kind eyes and the boyish smile. Just by looking at him, you could see he lived a happy life. A _peaceful_ one.

It was everything he deserved. After such an awful childhood, a stressful first love… He deserved the peace and family he had found with them.

And perhaps, she thought for the first time. So did _she_.

-  


All in all, Christmas day was not as awkward as she feared.

It was far easier to focus on the good. And with Haymitch holed up in the kitchen most of the afternoon, it was easy to forget about everything and just focus on the gifts.

Hers had gone down a treat. Peeta had loved the embroidered apron she had bought for him. Katniss had liked the leather jacket - although she supposed the girl hadn’t cared that it was a pain to find. And maybe, just maybe she had spoiled Prim with the darling horse-riding outfits and books…

“Another one for you, Effie!” Prim said happily, passing her the tiny gift. There was no tag, rather an _‘E’_ written in sharpie over the red wrapping paper.

She knew who’s wrapping paper it was though… “Johanna, please tell me this isn’t a gag gift.”

Jo rolled her eyes. “This is the first and last time I ever get you something nice.”

Intrigued, she carefully ripped the corner, comforted when she didn’t spot anything suspicious. She tore the rest, surprised to find a gift card.

“Picked it up when I got my nails done,” she explained awkwardly. “Portia suggested it, don’t read into it or anything.”

So Portia had known about the Halloween prank, she made a mental note to bring it up. How interesting of her friend to not tell...

Effie bit back a smile. “It is lovely, Jo. Thank you.”

She placed it in the little pile next to her. Watching as Finnick was handed a gift for him and grinning when he produced a matching dad and son set…

“That’s ridiculous,” Johanna cackled, not unkindly. In fact, she patted Prim on the shoulder. “Good one, kid.”

The pile of gifts went down quickly. They grew impatient at doing it one at a time and before long, the living room was just a pile of wrapping paper and gifts stacked in piles between each person…

“Time to clean up,” she said once it was clear the tree was empty.

The children grumbled a little bit, the good ones grabbed a handful and shifted to get up…

“Wait a minute!” Katniss said. “There’s one behind the stand.” She picked up the final gift, a small box no bigger than her hand… “It’s for you.”

The brunette thrust her hand towards Effie gracelessly, straining to reach.

“Thank you, dear.” She took it, frowning when she didn’t recognise the paper. “Who is this from?”

Maybe Portia, she thought as she opened the tag. Although, how her best friend snuck a present under Haymitch’s tree without her noticing…

  
_Effie,_  
_Merry Christmas, sweetheart._  


Her breath caught in her throat. She hadn’t brought Haymitch a gift, after all, it would only call for an awkward interaction.

She glanced at the kitchen door, wondering if he was listening. She wanted him there. Suddenly, his absence felt apparent and overwhelming in that very moment.

“Well go on then!” Prim insisted. “Open it.”

She felt the weight of all their eyes on her when she undid the wrapping paper. More carefully than she had earlier too, certain this would be the last gift she ever got from Haymitch.

It was a box that fit almost perfectly in her palm. A pretty red with a gold ribbon around the lid. She pulled that off carefully too, swallowing a hard lump in her throat. She felt emotional all of a sudden. But she was very wary of the children watching…

Inside, resting softly against silk was a gold bracelet.

Her eyes settled on the little gold charm, the even smaller thin little snout of what was undoubtedly a horse. And then onto the ridiculous bread and the Mockingjay and the fish and…

“Oh my God, she’s crying!” Johanna laughed. “What the fuck is in that box?”

Finnick craned his neck. “A necklace?”

“A bracelet,” Prim piped up in a knowing voice.

Johanna laughed harder. “Why is she crying over a clump of metal?”

Good question, she thought. Very good question.

Not that she was in any state to answer. Too busy looking at the blurry blob in her vision that was the Auiferous charm. _Seriously_ , that man had bought her a horse and never looked back in terms of gifts…

But it was sweet. So very sweet. And she had been so bloody stupid. So silly to throw their friendship away in fear when he had been nothing but patient and understanding with her.

“Maybe we should give Effie a moment,” Peeta suggested. Embarrassed, she tried to stop but it was too late. Thankfully, she managed to contain the sob but she felt the tears running down her cheeks and no doubt leaving streaks in her foundation…

There was some protest from some of the group but when it became obvious she did not have it in her to respond, they murmured about setting the table and left.

In the now-empty living room still littered with mess, she willed herself to get control. Ladies do not lose their composure like this, she chanted in her head.

Behind her, the kitchen door creaked open.

God and even the knowledge that he was about to walk in on her crying uncontrollably wasn’t enough to get her to stop. All the tension and stress and upset from the last two months was rushing out, glad to finally be felt…

“Fuck,” Haymitch cursed, shutting the door with a loud clunk. Big hands covered hers with the box. A blurry but worried face replaced the paper-covered carpet… “It’s just a stupid bracelet, princess. Didn’t mean to upset you that much.”

“It’s not stupid,” she replied, mortified when it came out more like a croak. “I’m stupid. Haymitch…”

He chuckled and her chest warmed at the familiar sound. “I’ve been telling you that one for years.”

She took a deep breath, did her best to blink away the tears…

“I’m sorry,” she sighed. Gently, she closed the box and without the bracelet to look at, she met his eyes. Waiting for the misery from the last two months to be there, for the bitter sting of guilt to overtake her again.

Instead, there was a faint hint of hope. Or maybe, she was imagining that. But she jumped on it. Gripped his hands and didn’t ignore the pull in her stomach.

It was not quite the perfect first kiss she had imagined between them. Well, first sober kiss. First kiss where they were both being open about their feelings. First…

His tongue poked at her lips and her brain turned to mush. Too focused on making sure she poured all the feelings from the past two months, from the past _two minutes_ into the kiss.

His teeth grazed her lips and sent sparks down her spine…

She felt him utter a curse more than she heard it. And the soft, slow way he pecked her lips next were like electric shocks of lust.

She didn’t want it to end. Ever.

Eventually, though, she needed to breathe and regretfully let him pull away. Belatedly realising she had been pressing the nape of his neck tightly, holding him to her…

Effie licked her lips, willing her brain to start back up again. “I…”

There was an unmistakable laugh from the other room. And she knew that the children hadn’t seen that. She knew. But the reminder of the company waiting for them in the next room brought her back down to Earth.

“I love you,” she said quickly before she could swallow the words back. Haymitch tensed, he always did. She knew he hated the words but there was no other way to describe the overwhelming feeling tightly bundled in her body, the yearning to feel him encased tightly in her embrace and never let him go again, to spend forever in this very moment…

Never again, she vowed. No more being stupid about them.

He clearly hesitated, his gaze so unsure and agonising. “Princess…”

She pecked the rest of the sentence away, eager to help him relax.

“I’m sorry I was so stupid,” she said between pecks. “Whatever you wanted that night, I want it now. If it’s not too late…”

He broke away with a laugh. “You’re joking?”

“I am not happy without you,” she confessed, holding his gaze so he knew she meant it.

Haymitch smirked and it was full of the same warmth and amusement as it used to be… “Took you fucking long enough.”

And then he kissed her.

Briefly, she wondered if they’d make it to Christmas dinner or whether they’d scar the children.

She had a good idea for a last-minute present.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, this was certainly a ride, right? You would not believe how hard this was to write. I have scrapped/lost a good 25 pages of this finale. And I'm not even sure this was a worthy ending but I did put sweat and tears into it so xD I can only hope. (Karma definitely came for me, I never want to write angst again lmao).  
> So, how much do we adore Haymitch in this universe? The poor man has the patience of a saint! Effie did not deserve the pretty bracelet after Halloween lmao. I like to imagine he'd bought it custom before then so he didn't have much of a choice.  
> I hope you enjoyed this, tell me all your thoughts! Was it a worthy ending? Are the children going to check on them and walk in on them? Is that going to lead to simultaneously the happiest and most awkward Christmas dinner ever? Did Portia do a good job convincing Effie she was being stupid?


End file.
